This image made from video released by British Petroleum (BP PLC) shows equipment being used to try and plug a gushing oil well in the Gulf of Mexico on Wednesday, May 26, 2010 during a maneuver known as a "top kill" that has never before been tried 5,000 feet underwater. The oil giant's chief executive earlier gave the procedure a 60 to 70 percent chance of working, and President Barack Obama cautioned Wednesday there were "no guarantees." Gulf Reprise
By Phasma Scriptor
So. The woodwork is unloading its "experts" ready to bloviate incessantly about the "solutions" to the engulfing of the Gulf. On MSNBC's Hardball and Countdown, we were mistreated with the perspectives of a former top exec with Shell Oil. And whose side do ya suppose he's on? Chris, Keith. Seriously? Dumped on our abused senses was the party-line about the latest proposed fix, not yet rolled out in the current crisis, a so-called "top kill" after the T-pot dome thing failed, twice, and after the next shot to be fired was ... a "junk shot". These experts, onscreen and off, admit that the odds of success are not high. Both the "top kill" and the "junk shot" are eerily familiar. Hmm? Oh, yes, I know. That commercial about Kohler toilets, the one in which the nerd tries to purposefully clog his toilet so he can hit on the hot female plumber. OMG! He's doing the "top kill" AND "junk shot" in a combined maneuver. And, and, and, oh s**t! Didn't work for him either. Right next door, Rachel Maddow does a feature entitled "That was then, this was then" wherein she compares the bizzy-dizzy responses to the Ixtoc-Gulf oil spill in 1979 to the ongoing BP methods. Guess what? All the unusual suspects, that the public has forgotten, were put into play then and, 31 years later, are having a redux moment. In other words, with the bleeding 4800 ft deeper, these clowns have the same old wet ammunition that were duds back then, including, yes, the "top kill" AND the "junk shot" AND the "dome" laughably referred to as the "sombrero" in the then then, alog with all the same-old-same-old clean-up equipment. The fundamental problem with both of these "plug the damn hole" tactics is that they use the typical Western thinking - meet force with force - instead of the ancient Eastern philosophy employed in, say, jiu jitsu or by Obi Wan Kenobi - use the fawce, Luke. In previous comments, I've suggested variations of the patented devices designed to plug jagged holes in the hulls of ships. As I've noted, the cricket choir was deafening. Dr. Steven Chu, Secy of Energy, sez he, has the best minds working on this disaster. Not to be bitter, but I hear the theme from Concentration echoing in my head, accompanied by finger-drumming. The variation of the 5 different patented designs (I was hoping 1 of Chu's geniuses would figure this out, but I'm left having to literally draw a picture; OK, a word picture) would require installation of a collar/sleeve (long enough to provide reinforcement/fracture resistance), affixed with large pins inserted from the outside, inside the 6 in. gusher pipe, as a detente (assuming there's nothing else that can serve that purpose). Outer reinforcement (if space is available) can be provided by the use of a collar/sleeve on the outside. The expandable device can then be inserted, unexpanded, of course (not that I think anyone reading this is a moron), using the same apparatus used to insert the siphon that was sucking a fraction of the crude last week. The enormous head generated from the oil reservoir would provide resistance to the expandable device (exp-dev) as it's inserted, but not massively. After the exp-dev is past the detente, it's expanded, slowly, allowing the head to be gradually closed off, which obviously uses the pressure of the oil's head to press the exp-dev against the detente. Alternatively, the extremely long shafts used to put the drill down hundreds of feet below the sea bed could be used to insert the exp-dev all the way down to the top of the reservoir, at which point, the exp-dev could be deployed without all the other stuff. My fingers are getting cramps.
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